The Child That Wasn't, The Child That Was

I've often thought of the paths that we take in life. Every decision we have made results in who we are today. For many of us, including me, it seems the regretful decisions outweigh the prudent decisions. But I wonder just how bad those decisions are. Recently, I felt able to place into words thoughts I've ran through my mind thousands of times. But first a little background. I've always been fascinated by all things military, aviation-related and a plethora of "man-things." I've ruminated thoughts of what might have been if this war or that plane crash had never happened. Lives ended at only 19 or 21 years, or whatever age. If this man or that woman had only lived to make an impact in their world. What if they had given birth to children? What would he have been, the Child That Wasn't? Would he have been a star student? Would he have become a doctor or professor? Maybe he would have become a preacher of the gospel. Or even better, maybe he would have become an incredible evangelist, reaching multitudes with the message of Christ. More than likely he would have brought his parents great joy. That's what children do. We don't have to imagine any negativity in this scenario. The negative side of this is the reason I'm writing. Because of some negative issue, the Child Isn't. I can almost hear your response to my proposition. You may ask, "how can you speculate on what might have been?" I don't know, I just do. But let me turn your question around. I ask, "how can we speculate on what might have been if we had not made that regretful decision?" Since you and I cannot change the past, why do we have so many regrets? Is it because we made a bad decision, or because we received recompense for our decision? More than likely it's the latter. Bad decisions without lasting ramifications are soon relegated to the distant category of "lessons I've learned." But those decisions with lasting impact can fill our days and nights with regret. But why? Let's say for instance that a woman makes a bad decision and winds up pregnant with a child. Many have opted out of the pregnancy, but not all. The child of indiscretion comes into this life and the mother may have serious concerns about her own actions. She may wonder how she'll be able to raise the child or what others may think. She may be castigated by society, though that seems rare these days. But what bad thing has the child brought to this situation? Nothing. The child had nothing to do with the decision. The child is the result of the decision. So now you are left with the only wise choice being to raise the child the best you can. Just how different is the Child That Was from the Child That Wasn't? Simple. We have the Child That Was. This child can impact so many others. This child can be a blessing. This child can bring joy and blessings. This child, though unplanned, is here. We must deal with it as if it is part of our lives. It's just the same as most any other decision we made. Remember, our decisions made us. So my advice is simply get on with life. Don't worry what might have been. You can't change it. However, I will advise you to look forward and consider your actions before you make that decision. Be content with what you have. Not what might have been, but The Child That Is.

The Search For Sunshine

Drawn to the isles. What could be a more rewarding temptation, than to enjoy them? O'ahu is an island with many beaches. Almost sounds silly doesn't it? Could you have an island without beaches? Sure, and O'ahu has it's share of rocky, beachless shoreline. Today's is a report on the search for sunny, unpopulated sand. We headed out for the northeast coast - the place that would complete our around-the-island travel. Contrary to popular myth you cannot drive a 2-wheel drive vehicle completely around the island. The farthest northwest tip is a tall, steep, rugged point that juts in to the Pacific. Only the adventurous hikers or 4-WD people get to make this trek. There are some gorgeous beaches along the Wa'ianae coast, but they were a little too crowed with tent cities for our liking. So, we just enjoyed the drive and the view. We finally settled on Papaoneone Beach, a lightly used beach adjacent to some high-rise condos. Finally sun, sand and surf. And another colony of sea turtles! It's easy to sit and watch them. Yesterday, we went to Nimitz Beach on the shore next to Barbers Point Coast Guard Station. We boogie-boarded out quite a bit from the shore and let the waves bring us in. The water was very shallow with a rocky reef that made it uncomfortable to swim. So... we played sea turtle and basked in the sun. We closed the evening with a trip to the Ala Moana Mall for some real searching! Another form of paradise for those drawn to the aisles.

Man, It's A Jungle Out There!

The best laid plans of mice and men... There are many mountain and jungle trails here on O'ahu. Probably best said that mountain trails ARE jungle trails since you don't seem to get one without the other. Our plan was to hike the Maunawili Trail to the Maunawili Falls. But from the beginning it was ripe for a challenge. First of all, we had to take Pali Highway to Auloa Road, not the first one but the second one (except that we were coming from the opposite way, which meant we needed to take the first one and not the second one!) When we found it we then took it to Maunawili Road to Kelewina Road and on to a side street to park. If this all sounds Greek to you, it isn't. It's Hawaiian and boy, do we butcher it! It's a beautiful language and it seems like it would be easy to learn, so maybe we'll come back and study it more. Our guide book says "it's a user-friendly waterfall... and the hiking is straightforward." You cross the Maunawili Stream 4, count them 4, times. "You can boulder hop it," it also declares. Well, the first thing we had to encounter was the mud. It's hard to boulder hop streams when your shoes are covered in mud. But we made 3 of the 4. At the fourth one the shoes were a little too muddy and Oops! she slipped on a rock and pulled me in with her. Onward we slogged. When we came to the missing sign, we climbed almost straight down the side of the mountain. "How did we know the sign was missing?" you ask. Easy, they stole the sign, but left the signpost. Elementary, my dear Watson! After what seemed like hundreds of feet of sheer descent we came to a fork in the stream. The trail appeared to go to the right so we followed it. After trudging further into the jungle, suddenly and without warning the trail ended. So... maybe the sign was for something else we thought. My intrepid tour guide, who doubles as my wife, said "Hey, maybe we should have stayed on the trail we were on." So up the thousands of feet of sheer mountain trail (actually only 110 feet) we resumed hiking on the ridge trail. Soon the sounds of distant water gave way to the chatter of jungle monkeys, arguments of myna birds and the occasional splashing of crocodiles waiting for their next meal. (The story needs a little more drama right here.) Actually, there were no monkeys or crocs. There was much noise from native birds and the occasional airliner flying overhead. Oh, the sounds of paradise! We hiked what was called the Maunawili Connector Trail for about a mile uphill when it connected with the Maunawili Trail. I'm beginning to see a pattern here! Along the way were looking to see if Hansel and Gretel left any bread crumbs for us to eat in case we became lost again. But, no Hansel, no Gretel and thankfully, no Big Bad Wolf. Any way, back to the story. We ultimately hiked to the base of the cliffs that tower over the windward side of the island. What incredible views we had. Looking almost straight up nothing but a wall of stone, to the sides nothing but jungle and over our shoulders in the distant, the Pacific Ocean. Wow! Since we didn't find the falls, which was our intended goal we set off again to take the trail where the missing sign was. Or wasn't. I'm not sure how that works grammatically. This time during the descent we passed what we have come to realize are "tourist hikers". We can tell this by the heavy panting they are doing while ascending this trail. So placing our lives in their hands we asked if they knew the way to the falls. They said, "yes." Hallelujah, we're going to make it, we thought. Then the caveat. When you get to the fork in the stream and the trail turns to the right, you don't follow it. Instead you get into the stream and follow it uphill for a while. Then the trail starts up again! Wow, how come we couldn't figure that out? Anyway, we were soon rewarded with a cool dip in the waters beneath Maunawili Falls. The water was cool. Very cool! Breathtaking cool! But, not cold. Go figure. I won't bore you with the details of the return trip. Suffice it to say I didn't boulder hop the stream once. I just got in it and walked through it. If for no other reason than to clean the mud off my shoes. Every intrepid explorer received bounty for his efforts. Captain Cook had some islands named for him (for a while), Columbus had a city in Ohio named for him, Lewis and Clark had.... Umm, I forgot. Oh well, my wife and I had shave ice. Oh yeah, a fitting bounty for a day's adventure. Need a tour guide? Just call Tarzan and Jane. We're busy. Gotta go swimming! Aloha!